"So I'm chasin' bitches like Tom chased Jerry." This weekend I have the highlight of anyone's year: The Pimps 'n Ho's Gala Affair. So, in preparation I updated my pimp wardrobe, and stole a feather for my pimp hat, which I've never actually had the opportunity to wear. But it's all money well spent, as I get hardcore ghetto gangsta pictures like these, and you get the opportunity to see a little of my bedroom. Ladies you might want to try to memorize the layout, it'll save time later.
"Do I need to go upside that ho's head? ...Maybe."
"No, just a threat of the pimp hand. Can't damage the goods."
"Yes I believe those is some good ho's."
"Whoa, whoa, whoa. No pictures."
"Now you did it. You gets Tha Pimp Hand™. Next time it'll be a gat, SUCKA!"
There is never a next time. So, that's what my outfit looks like. Part of it anyway. I still have to add an undershirt, a pipe, several gold chains (or one extremely gaudy one), a cane, and pants. That's right. These are pants free pictures. It's layers of depth like that one, that really keep readers comming back to The Wonder Blog.
- Scott
- Scott
Here's the cheapest way to get your neckwear... 1. Find a Benz, a Jag and a clock. 2. Break the hood ornaments off of the cars. 3. Take all 3 to your nearest wanna-be hustla. He'll make them gold and put them on graduated length chains for you. At this point, you are totally in business. Now all you need are pants 'cuz a real pimp would do some crunches and ditch the shirt for that truly sleazy look underneath his jacket.
ReplyDeleteHmmm... you speak with such authority on the subject I'm tempted to ask how you came to know all this. And yet, not quite tempted enough. I'll just trust that when you're ready to tell me how you afford all that stuff you will.
ReplyDelete- Scott
If you can name one movie... or real life pimp that conseals a "glock" or for that matter any weapon other than his cane... then i won't suggest instead of a glock you should probaly stick with getting hoes to become an offical pimp... Oh and if your thinking of saying the pimp in Next Friday... Your wrong he had a Rugger.
ReplyDelete... oh and that last comment was from ... Your little brother who for some reason knows your password to your blog... so i figured it would be easier to use your login than it would be to make my own.;)
ReplyDelete