It's a bird, it's a plane, it's a SUPERMARKET

That's right. Super. And it's to this market of markets that I go to buy things that keep me alive. These "things" are commonly called food. The glitch I have with this deal is that I don't really make an active list of what I need. And I never go grocery shopping until I'm STARVING. 11 Hungry man dinners and 3 packages of Jello Snack Packs, yeah good meal.

But I've gotten really good over this year of alone-living-ness at shopping. So good in fact that I have a route I take through the store every time. It never fails me. Other shoppers look on in shock and awe as I storm through the aisles like a commando in the bush (ha ha ha, I said bush.) Seriously I use the patented-by-every-kid-who-thinks-he's-awesome ride-the-kart technique. That's high level. It also gets you around faster. In one case it got me around to hitting a very attractive lady's kart faster, but that's really the exception. As a rule it works well. You might think that after a year of living away from the parents the childish joy of buying whatever food you want would wear off. And I would think that too. But it really never did. I still announce loudly that I'll buy what I want and when I want to anyone near by. And that I can eat my dessert first too if I want.

I also enjoy the sometimes akward exchange at the checkout counter. For example once I was buying an FHM Magazine, some jerkey (the literal kind, not the kind people buy FHM for), and some cookies. The thing that makes this funny is that my dad called me at the exact moment and we started talking. So as the old lady cashier was checking my items out I said something like "I'm at Shop and Save...yeah, just getting the essentials." Her reaction was priceless.

Or what happened yesterday. I was buying my usual items (stuff that requires 1-2 minutes preperation). Anyway the conveyer belt sent my groceries down to me I was putting them in a bag. But something struck me as odd. I had put half a cart's worth of food into one bag?? How in the hell. Breifly I thought I had some kind of magical Marry Poppins bag. Sadly my next thought was how good it would be to steal and smuggle things. As I put my 4th salad bowl in it things started to fall out the sides. I was between two seperate bags. Dammit. At least the sexy checkout chick liked it. - Scott