Why the title? No, I'm not brewin' some boomshine, although that does sound like a good idea. Seriously, as advertised in GTA: Vice City, you really can get messed up just smelling it. And how I know that... isn't important. Nothing to talk about in print anyway, damn you Patriot Act! You and your capitalization on national panic and jingoism. Ok, enough hating on an act of congress, on to the post proper:
Brace yourself. I, Scott Gresham, the man, the myth, the blogger, may have a job. A job where they allow, nay, encourage me to work with explosives. A job in a fireworks factory. Now if only I were the Human Torch, then there would be the kind of danger I'm really after. Also I'd get to do a trailer closing one liner with Maria Menounos. And I'd love any interaction with Maria, even if it was just a bit part in a potentially cheesy movie, or apologizing to her in court for breaking into her mansion and hiding all those cameras. Jessica Alba is right alongside her in that respect.
And as long as we're on the topic of celebrities I have something to get off my chest. Yeah, we all find their lives interesting. We like hearing about who they're dating, what they're buying, whether or not there's naked pictures of them available online. Hell, we even like watching them play poker. Poker is fine, there's money involved. It's interesting. But now AMC has gone and crossed the line; violated all that which we hold sacred. They've brought us celebrities playing Charades. CELEBRITY CHARADES!
I now expect the celebrity appeal to die off, we've seen it all. From celebrities leading lives of the rich and famous, jet setting around the world, drinking the blood of the exploited working class as a chaser for their 400 dollar shots of vodka, to playing the same game normal people break out when a party is completely dead. What's next AMC? Celebrities getting together at 7:14 on a Friday to hang out in the living room of their parent's place and say "What do you guys want to do tonight?" "I don't know, what do you want to do tonight?" "How about a movie" "Nah, nothing good is out" "Ok how about bowling" "We did that last week" "Fine, let's just stay in and watch Runaway Bride on TBS, and then catch the Runaway Bride update on CNN." Because we're almost there.
- Scott
Wednesday, June 22, 2005
BOOMshackalacka
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Oh, come on! My only tattered bits of self-esteem are derived off seeing celebrities doing ridiculous things! How dare you try to take that away?! Also, what else would I do in my time off except watch "The Fabulous Life Of..." and talk at the TV? Seriously, think about what you are saying here.
ReplyDeleteI agree in that it is disgusting grandiosity, but we cannot do without. Let us simply embrace it; resistance is futile and all that jazz...
(plus, it is great diversion as I plot to take over the world)
Retract now!
~c.the(VH1addict)great
I agree. Celebrity shows should die off soon. Don't get me wrong. I do enjoy seeing all that ridiculous stuff and all, but not to the point of seeing them play Charades, or even poker for that matter. I just don't care. Smells like a hint of celebrity desperation in the air.
ReplyDeleteThe more I know about Celebrities, the more I hate them. I loathe Paris Hilton. I would love to be crazy about Jessica Simpson, have you SEEN her in the new movie, but I can't I hate her because I know too much. And I hate all the Pro-Environment celebrity activist with their driving eco-friendly hybrids, yet having their personal jets fly them everywhere. And their 3 houses, immaculately kept yards being watered 24 hours a day. I hate seeing rich rappers show off how much money they burn on MTV and if I hear one more say "And here is where the magic happens" when they walk into their bedroom I'm gonna open a vein.
ReplyDeleteWhew... *sigh*