Unfadeable so please don't try to fade this...

First of all Timmy's back. How about that. Who had 10 days after he last posted? Nobody? Because they had Rob and Scott to entertain them? Oh. Sweet. Well then, let me apologize for my recent absence. I meant to post yesterday, but FedEx, who is apparently staffed by 90 year old women, couldn't find the strength to knock audibly on my door. So to get my new video card, I had to track down the actual FedEx Office. This took far too long. But on the bright side I did get to find out exactly where the butthole of Springfield is located.

But that's not all that distracted me. Nay, not at all. I was, in fact, penning the Charter of Our Pad, or the COP. The purpose of the COP is to lay down specific rules for our living together. This should pre-emptively circumvent any forseeable problem we could possibly have. You might check my facts on this one, but I think it's the best idea anyone's had, ever. The first issue we ran into was milk; Rob drinks it like a baby seal. So the rule for milk is as follows:

1. Rule 1: Milk consumption.

• Each tenant shall have his own gallon jug of milk and drink only from his particular jug. However, should either tenant of the apartment have two jugs of milk the less full one is fair game and indeed must be power drained. Because there's no race like the race to beat the expiration date on a gallon of milk. It's like playing chicken with food posioning
  

2. Rule 2: Disarming (as in, removing my arm).

• When fighting with swords, it is never a legal move to lock my frickin' claymore with your left schimitar, surprising both of us enough that we forget about your right schimitar and it's respectable attempt to cut my arm off. Because damn, that hurt.

3. Rule 3: Swords in general...

• You know what? Let's just leave the swords alone. I'm still hoping to get my security deposit back.
  

4. Rule 4: Out on the Town.

• We're going to get escorted off private property, and/or arrested. I don't know why, but it seems to be what happens. Just accept it, and take a funny mugshot. That way when we're famous we won't look like this. Also let's hope our police sketches are way more accurate. On second thought, let's hope they're even further off.
  

5. The Final Rule: So far.

• USE A DIFFERENT COLORED TOWEL. I very nearly used your used towel this morning. Do you know why this is? Because somebody decided to use a towel in the exact same shade of hunter green that I'm currently using. So from now on pretend the bathroom is a party, and the towel rack is two girls at that party. Let's not have them embarrassed because they're wearing the same thing? Ok?
  

And that's it for now. Feel free to add rules. If they're good enough and they seem to work out in my favor, I might even add them.

- Scott