Quite Possibly the Most Dangerous Thing Ever

I was about to comment on Tim's blog about how when I read the titles of previous posts instead of saying "This is huge" and "The chick and the rhino..." I read it as "this chick is huge" and laughed as I pictured a fat chick. But that seemed too immature, and I didn't want anyone to know about that little transgression, so I decided to regale you all with some of my activities of late.

Sorry, about the lack of posting but this parasite known as the 'real world' has been draining my time like Ruben Studdard drains a triple thick milkshake keg. (Two fat people jokes and I'm only two paragraphs in...this is lookin' up). Well after my finals ended I was in a daze. I wasn't quite sure what to do with myself. Sure I could play EverQuest, but I felt something else in my masculine makeup (that's the makeup of my psyche, not the Mabeline I'm wearing) pulling me toward some vague, shadowy goal. I felt like Roy Neary building the Devil's Tower out of mashed potato's, he didn't know what it was....but he knew it was important.

Well, mashed potato's are (as it turns out) exactly what I was after. I wanted to build a potato gun. They're great toys, but have the potential to seriously injure someone. What's that called? That's right, bonus points! Man has long had a love affair with potato guns going back to the mid 1800's. Archaeologists recently discovered that the period from 1845-50 (affectionately known as the 'potato famine') was simply a group of raccous, drunken Irishmen running around with their proto-potato guns. Instead of hairspray, which hadn't been invented yet, one of them would just burp into the chamber and the volatile fumes were more than enough to shoot a spud.

However, this is all well and good. But I'm living in the 21st century...isn't there something more I could do? As it turns out, yes. A pneumatic potato gun. It'll be a great test of my pskills. Besides, a similar design to the one I'm using (though on a slightly larger scale) has propeled a potato past the sound barrier. So yeah, it's a good gun. The best part though? I'm suppposedly house sitting for my parents right now. So I'm all alone working on explosive ordinance. I truly love my shenanigans.

That's all for now, I'm out like the Pringles cans at Kristy Alley's house.
(THREE fat jokes!)

- Scott