Misuse of Skills + Free Time = Crazy Devious

Man, that was a rough week. Thanks for the condolences. What do you mean how were you supposed to know? I didn't post for almost five week days! Where were the search parties? I could be lying dead surrounded by women. Hot women. In mourning. That killed me through "exhaustion." Fortunately for all of you (and the women) I'm still alive and, like Principal Skinner, was merely trapped under an avalanche of school work. It took me two weeks to get out of the holiday funk and back into doing awe inspiringly great work in classes.

For instance, I'd been putting off a 7 page research paper since the first day of the class. It was due today; yesterday I had nothing. Today I spent the morning cutting the paper back to seven pages rather than the roughly 15 it was going to be if I didn't. And that's just one day of work! I think I was just hungry to write. Really write something good. I can't remember the last time I had the chance to. (Phantom Waldorf: Neither can we!) Shut-up voice in my head!

Anyway, two things happened this week that warrant discussion. The first I'll let speak for itself. (So technically it warrants monologue.)

For the visually impaired it says: Mr. Pibb + Red Vines = Crazy Delicious.

Who knew that those crazy kids from The 'Bu would make it so big on SNL. And by making it big on SNL I mean they illicited a laugh from me without resorting to something completely worthless. Of course, that it wasn't actually live might be worth some debate... but I digress. Awesome shirt. And in fact, it was in this apparel of the counterculture that I went out into the neighborhood with the other thing that's kept me so busy this week: my senior project.

My senior project is kind of in the vein of Tim's trickery. While other kids are going for the gold(en paper of their diploma) with legitimate projects based on databases, and accountant spreadsheets, I decided to forge for myself and my partner a slightly more interesting project. A little bit on the 1337 side of things. The project, the quest, the goal: a cantenna. The ultimate in wireless network extension. Take a look:

I can't believe I'm allowed to have a drill.

Clearly visible are the aviator "safety" glasses, drill bits, lengths of wire, connectors, and the can Bailey's Irish Cream came in. Oh Lordy, how I loves me some Bailey's. All mad scientists need their alcohol of choice. There wasn't any around or I'd do the real mad scientist thing and chug moonshine. Anyway, much like Captain Planet, when those elements combine you get yourself a cantenna. And a license to wreak havoc.

Justin: the Igor to my Dr. Hornstien.

See the green? See how it's so high all of a sudden? That's the result of pointing a powerful cantenna at the computer. The amount of gain that I get out of it borders on what's considered illegal by the FCC. So that's cool. It's also a MacGyver'd together $12 dollar solution to what would cost about $250 to buy professionally. Anyway, with all of this software and technology we started to pick up networks in my neighborhood. Like mad. So we decided to look around.

Cleverly armed with an arsenal of... armorment, I set out to reap digital desctruction on the landscape. This took the form of getting into the router configurations of unsecured routers and politely advising them that security was very important. Such messages generally read "You've been TAGGED... SUCKA!" and "I pity the fool don't use WPA encryption."

Such is the power of a devious geek. I'm Reginald Hornstien, and that's one to think about.

- Scott