My Mom, the diplomat

Sorry about the 11 days since my last posting. Things are crazy here in the Little Easy. I wish the weather was better 8 straight days of rain. Is this Seattle or what? Anyway last weekend I went up to the U of I. I hit up the foam party, which was awesome. Nothing makes a party great like a suffocating 8 foot wall of foam.

Ironically, nothing suffocates quite like it. You can almost breathe, but not quite. There's also the side benefit of having a taste in your mouth like you just dropped the f-bomb in fifth grade. (that's for you kids who got your mouths "washed out." And I mean the liquid soap kids, not you pansy assed bar soapers. I put bar soaps on my cereal, like little pieces of banana! So cram it.) Other than that it was an alright time...while I was there. It ended up that I got seperated from Steve, and Maggie (more on her below). And walked my soaking wet ass home by my self and got lost in the process. Shit. Oh well, some kindly drunks helped me out (as they usually will) and found my way back to dry clothes. Sadly, the room I was supposed to be sleeping in was...otherwise occupied. So were the other 3 options I had. Damn, three hookups and none for me?! I got severely gyped.

Oh wait, did I say I got gyped? I didn't yet know the meaning of gyped. The whole damn AKL frat house was too busy for me to get any sleep (not that I completely trust that I would wake up unharmed). So I went to the one place in 200 miles that was mine and mine alone: my car. Slept in the back seat, which ain't no place for a man to be without a woman. But it is a good place to hear interesting snippets of conversation. For instance an estranged couple walking by offered this gem: "Come on" "No, you fucked him. And now you won't see him for another six months!" Brilliant. Lots of angry drunken people. And I woke up with a crick in my neck like I couldn't believe. Not a good trade.

I headed home the next day, my mom asked about the weekend. I told her about Maggie, a girl that looks exactly like my brother's girlfriend, but skinnier and taller. I described her to my mom just like that. I didn't really think much of it. A few days later I come home and my mom is describing this girl to Katie (brother's girl): "she looks just like you but skinny and taller." If you don't know my mom, don't get the wrong idea. She's just about the nicest person going. But this was just a slip of the tounge. (Btw, Katie isn't bad looking or fat). So we're making fun of her for saying that and she starts to feel bad about it. So she calls Katie's house but doesn't get Katie. The person on the other end said that she couldn't talk right now so my mom asks (and I quote): "Oh she's busy?, is she eating or something" I almost peed my pants. COME ON! Way to apologize. Rofl - Scott