What the hell do I do?

Scott Adams recently asked his audience to describe their job in one self-deprecating sentence. Alan "the Great" recently asked me to describe my job in general. In the interest of answering all the idle inquiries of ignominious minds, I shall combine the above into one endeavor and I'll try not to use any semi-colons.

My job:

I install and maintain digital audio and visual recording systems for people that will use them at 1% of their potential, and whose words aren't worth recording in the first place.

I do this for the Courtrooms of Illinois and Missouri. Or at least I did... until today.

Returning from a week-long marathon install, I'm told by my boss that I need to talk with her in the conference room. Alone. In ten minutes. Meeting her in the room she asked how I was doing. Bad sign. Anytime someone wants to know your mental/emotional state before they get down to business it means that they're concerned about your reaction to the coming news.

She proceeded to tell me that they are looking for a replacement for my position.

...because they're promoting me. Because I "...kick far too much ass to continue working in [my] current position." Her words. Really.

The long and the short of it is that I'm now working in a different department within the company (the nice one, actually) as a result of my capacity to absorb large amounts of information quickly. Since I'm now on the medical side instead of legal my new job description (starting Monday) would be as follows.

My job:

I install and maintain business software allowing Luddites and bureaucrats to push more mind-numbing forms across larger distances, more quickly.

To be fair there's also some pretty sweet voice-recognition and OCR software at play. But that was too hard to work into my semi-pithy job description.

So that's what I do... now.