Please pardon the below. I was temporarily emsane. Emsanity is a condition where, due to a percieved tragedy a person becomes temporarily emo (though for some the condition is known to last years). I was lucky. The emsanity passed within minutes, but not before I had given myself an asymetric haircut, bought a messenger bag which I covered in small buttons bearing ironic statements, and wrote a shitty acoustic guitar song about my feelings.
Thank God I got out before I started cutting people. I know you're really supposed to cut yourself to let the pain out, but I'm very sympathetic so I think it would do. Besides, what immortal hand or eye could cut my fearful symmetry? (Lingering poetry references are an aftereffect of emsanity, bear with me.)
If I've brought infected any of you with my earlier affliction I have good news: there is a cure. And that cure, that I stumbled upon in the course of my moping, is ridiculous pictures of me. I had forgotten these as they existed in a time when I was between digital cameras.
Take three, as often as you'd like. And call me in the morning. Seriously. I have a hard time getting up. Enjoy.
Beware: Not every street on the coast of Mexico takes high tide into account. And no one could have predicted those gams! (I bet Nostradamus feels like a failure.)
Survivorman learned it all right here. On a desert island? Pick up part of a tree and do some reps. It might not help you survive, but at least when they find you they'll remark on your guns.
Imagine I get killed. There, you've seen Apocalypto. Taken at the table where sacrifices were offered, I kid you not, about half a second before our Mayan tour guide put a stop to it. I'm fun to travel with. (And I think a bit large for their sacrifical altar.)
Good luck.
- Scott
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ReplyDeleteuh, i'm bored. would you mind changing your top and bottom five for me? thanks.
ReplyDeleteI was getting to that ex-wifey. But I'll do it tomorrow, just because you asked.
ReplyDelete- Scott
How anyone could look at those thighs and then declare 'uh, I'm bored' boggles my mind.
ReplyDeleteExtravagant welcomes back my ducklet. You have been missed. Mostly by JV.
Pfft... you were practically pining for my return. In fact, it goes beyond pining you were like... oak-ing.
ReplyDeleteStill, good to be back.
I feel so complete now having seen the legendary Mayan altar sacrifice picture. Not only have I seen it now, but it's much better than I had imagined in my head. Excellent post.
ReplyDeleteFrom Paris with their messed up keyboards
-Stevo
Yeah, I looked at the thighs. I'm still bored.
ReplyDeleteStevo, thanks for the quasi-exotic hit. See you state-side.
ReplyDeleteJV, there's no need to make outrageous claims. We all like you here already.
- Scott
Thanks man. They are pretty nice thighs, I have to admit.
ReplyDelete